But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
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He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
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His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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