NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
