you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
