Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me. http://tfl.nu/6ugc
  Replies (15) Good night (762) Bad night (2175)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do http://tfl.nu/8eef
  Replies (10) Good night (3350) Bad night (952)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina http://tfl.nu/bmhg
  Replies (100) Good night (6639) Bad night (2333)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life. http://tfl.nu/74qx
  Replies (17) Good night (5684) Bad night (873)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk. http://tfl.nu/227n
  Replies (11) Good night (4207) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house http://tfl.nu/sze6
  Replies (16) Good night (1933) Bad night (2678)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition. http://tfl.nu/mkq9
  Replies (16) Good night (5505) Bad night (888)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now. http://tfl.nu/ln6x
  Replies (8) Good night (2314) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious (781): Oh my god you need to get off of facebook. http://tfl.nu/ws52
  Replies (10) Good night (3273) Bad night (1185)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms http://tfl.nu/9llu
  Replies (4) Good night (437) Bad night (877)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me http://tfl.nu/4kao
  Replies (1) Good night (618) Bad night (284)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time. http://tfl.nu/ulsc
  Replies (3) Good night (494) Bad night (914)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick. http://tfl.nu/8yhk
  Replies (3) Good night (411) Bad night (445)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top. http://tfl.nu/vhr3
  Replies (3) Good night (954) Bad night (273)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ? http://tfl.nu/274k
  Replies (1) Good night (283) Bad night (489)

Randomize