Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
