my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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