I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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