Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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