You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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