Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize
