i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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