remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
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