Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
