It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
