would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
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