after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
