Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
