your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
