I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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