are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Randomize
