it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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