Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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