my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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