She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
