We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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