these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
