I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
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