super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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