I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
