He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
