It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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