why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
