That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
