what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Randomize
