i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
The air taste purple.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
