You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Let's paint friendship bongs
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
