I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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