she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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