flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
