quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize