Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Randomize
