No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
You need Xanax blowdarts
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The Olympian is in my bed
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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