I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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