What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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