Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
