God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You pole danced in your parka.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
