if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
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