saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
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