is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
