so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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