Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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